MARKINC Ministries

Making Abundant Riches Known In the Name of Christ

Mothering: A Marathon, Not a Sprint

Posted At : November 18, 2008 6:50 PM | Posted By : Sharon Betters
Related Categories: Parenting

In response to a blog I wrote on Overwhelmed Young Moms, Wendy asked, "What if those overwhelming days seem to be blending into each other? I know my children are my ministry, but I really don't feel up to the job. I keep praying, but I must not be hearing God's response. He allowed me to be in this place at this time so why do I feel I can't do this?" Wendy is expressing what many mothers experience every day and I promised her I would post a response to her plea for help. Here are some of my thoughts based on my own parenting years:

  1. Parenting is a marathon, not a sprint. Recognize that you will have bad days mixed in with good moments. After our son's kindergarten teacher saw how discouraged I was with our son's classroom behavior, she touched my shoulder, smiled and said, "This, too, shall pass!" I realized that this "bad behavior" was normal and part of my job was to help him change. And that wouldn't happen overnight.

  2. Marathon runners look forward to the cups of water offered from the sidelines. Mommies need to look for and accept cups of cold water that refresh just enough to get her through the next leg of the race. God offers us the Living Water through a personal relationship to Jesus. We find that refreshing, life-giving water in His Word. (See my article, Ancient Paths to Rest in the Feature Article Section of this website.) Before you immediately respond that an overwhelmed young mom doesn't have time to comb her hair let alone spend time in the Word, listen carefully. We do what's important to us. If we view time in the Word as critical to our sanity, we'll find time to make it happen. But here's the caution. There is no recipe or one way to cultivate intimacy with Christ. Don't pile guilt on if you can't spend an hour a day in the scriptures! As a young mom, I kept a Christian radio station on in our home and our car. Praise music was always in the background and once in a while I heard a clip of a speaker or interview that was just the right encouragement for the moment. Write out key scriptures and post them strategically around your home, at the kitchen sink, in the laundry room, on the bathroom mirror. Pray for your children before you get out of bed. Take ten minutes before your kiddies get up and read a quick devotional designed for young moms (anyone have a suggestion) or from the classics My Utmost for His Highest or Streams in the Dessert. Plan periodic times where you can spend more time in the Word, perhaps once a month or once a week. Don't miss the joy because of self-imposed guilt caused by your inability to have morning devotions every day.

  3. Look for a Titus 2 woman to be your cheerleader and help mother you. The Apostle Paul taught the young Pastor Titus to teach older women to teach younger women how to love their husbands and their children, among other things. Attend a women's Bible study and look for a prayer warrior who will pray for you and your children. If you can't find a woman like this, read books (yes, take time to read) by women you admire. As a young mom some of my mentors were women I never met, some who were no longer living on this earth. Susannah Wesley was one of them!

  4. And don't overlook the role a single woman can have in your life. Some of the best helpers with our children were young single women who loved children and they made my life richer by their insights and longing for intimacy with Christ.

  5. Make your relationship to Jesus obvious to your children by the way you pray with them throughout the day, perhaps praying for the person in the rushing ambulance or the family next door or for daddy at work. Talk to Jesus as though He is right there, because He is.

How about it, girls? How would you answer Wendy's plea for tips on building confidence as a mommy?


In His grip,
Sharon

Comments (Comment Moderation is enabled. Your comment will not appear until approved.)
Erin's Gravatar I would love to find a Titus 2 woman. It has been hard for me to do so. I was hoping it would just naturally happen, but after almost 3 years at my church (GRPC) it has just never happened. Any thoughts or advice? Also thanks for the blog tonight. I feel encouraged by what you had to say. I understand where Wendy is coming from...girl you are NOT alone.
# Posted By Erin | 11/19/08 10:13 PM
Sharon's Gravatar Dear Erin, Thank you for your response and question about finding a Titus 2 woman. Yours is a common plea and longing. Sometimes we have an expectation of such a relationship that might blind us to the Titus 2 women opportunities surrounding us. I did not have one woman in my life that I considered "my" Titus 2 woman. Actually, I didn't know there was a such a woman! Spiritual mothering was not a well known concept when I was learning how to balance life as a young wife and mother. But I saw numerous women as role models, each one reflected a key character quality that I hoped God would cultivate in my life. The older woman who faithfully taught women's Bible study showed me the importance of making scripture study a priority and connecting with other women a must. The women who oversaw the nursery schedule (with joy) taught me the importance of finding my own niche and the priority of caring for our covenant children; the women who always worked behind the scenes, preparing a home like atmosphere for church events taught me the importance of learning how to work together; the older woman who still looked her husband in the eyes when he talked, who never criticized or made fun of him behind his back taught me the power of encouragement. Not one of these women knew they were helping mold me into the woman I am today but I count each of them as my Titus 2 women. And then there were the ones I worked with on ministry projects. I learned so much about relationships and that God is in the details AND that each one of us has a important role. I learned how to pray from older women who regularly showed me by their own lives the value and privilege of prayer. I still read biographies and auto-biographies of women whose intimacy with Christ shaped their callings. Two of my favorites are Amy Carmichael and Mary Winslow. Their sacrificial lives helped take me through the darkest place in my own.
You have voiced the longing of so many young women and I hope that this helps broaden the view of women to see that all around them are Titus 2 women who would never believe they are capable of "mentoring" another woman, but they do it with their lives every day. And you, my friend, are mentoring those who are coming behind you!
# Posted By Sharon | 11/27/08 11:55 AM
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