Sowing Seeds with Tears

"Sharon, at some point you will tire of this pain and decide you can't bear it any longer. When that happens, you will be faced with a choice. Will you choose life or bitterly choose to never surrender to God's purposes in Mark's death?" My friend had earned the right to make such a challenging statement and ask this question. Her gentle voice did not condemn me but rather consoled me with the hope that I would have a choice about how to respond to what seemed unbearable sorrow.

I often felt like a dead man walking as I accepted the challenge of Psalm 126:5-6: "Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him."

In those words I heard a promise of joy but also a challenge that required great strength. I concluded that the writer was exhorting me to face my daily tasks with determination to fulfill my responsibilities as best I could, even if tears streamed down my face, even if my emotions screamed out for me to hide in my room, to refuse to face the needs of those around me.

I chose to see each daily, mundane task as a seed to be planted, trusting that no matter how many tears accompanied my obedience that eventually I would see some kind of fruit, experience some kind of joy, and laugh once again.

Last summer I posted the blog Choosing Life When It's Dark Inside and described some of the songs of joy that are growing from the seeds sown in tears.

I also encourage you to visit the website of Griefshare where you will find more articles on Surviving the Holidays. This is one of the best sites I have found for grieving families: http://www.griefshare.org/holidays/#articles

As you live through each day of this Christmas season, choose to sow seeds that will one day reap a harvest of joy. Each tiny act of mercy or performing daily, mundane tasks will take you closer to experiencing the fruit of God's purposes.

In His Grip,
Sharon