The assignment was simple: Identify one activity or goal on your "bucket list" for 2009 for your marriage and share it with the group at our final gathering. Our married couples class had been meeting every Sunday morning for several months and we had addressed some basic but at times difficult issues. This was our first Date Night at the Betters and the atmosphere was casual and expectant. One topic led to another until Chuck said, "Ok, let's hear your bucket list goals for 2009." Each spouse shared, some cryptically, others with abandon: better communication, getting priorities on the same page, dealing with a specific sin issue, cultivating closer relationships with extended family, having more "fun!"

When Chuck and I reviewed the evening discussion later, we realized that unless each of us mapped out a plan for accomplishing our goals, it was likely we could meet in December and we all would have the same goals for 2010 because the tyrannical needs of urgent every day life would cancel out addressing the important tasks on our marriage bucket lists. For example, if I want to have a closer relationship with Chuck, I need to plan ways I will cultivate that relationship, i.e. date nights, praying together every day, calling him just because. If I want to find a better way to communicate, I will plan time for communicating, study him to determine how he responds to facial expressions and tones of voice. In other words, I will be intentional. Building a strong, godly marriage requires planning, hard work, humility, planning - yes, I said planning twice!

I recently reviewed my two "bucket lists." I have one for 2009 and one for the rest of my life. I wrote about this bucket list in a previous blog post. I concluded that unless I wrote out a plan for accomplishing my goals, I would come to January, 2010, and write out the exact same list. Forcing myself to carefully consider my goals revealed that I absolutely must give up other activities if I am to be successful in experiencing the joy of successfully fulfilling these dreams.

Bucket lists are for people who recognize life is short, that at any moment, we can "kick the bucket!" We want to make sure we are using the gift of time in a way that has an eternal purpose. Making a list and checking it twice, and again and again, confronts me with choices and gives me the opportunity to decide exactly what is important enough for my time and effort.

After reviewing my lists, I am pretty sure I still want to accomplish every item, some in 2009, others before I "kick the bucket." I'm working on a plan so that I can intentionally cross off accomplished goals, one at a time. Or I can adjust the list as real life adjusts my priorities.

How about you? What's on your bucket list? And how will you make it happen?

In His Grip,
Sharon