I really fight the standard clichés we often use as Christians such as "trust God" or "have faith" or even "God is good all the time." When we lost our 16-year old son Mark (our youngest child) in a car accident in 1993 even the Scriptures and the hymns seemed to mock us. And yet, within clichés is often God's truth.

One day our congregation sang, "I surrender all, all to thee my blessed Savior, I surrender all." I missed Mark so much and resented that he was gone. My heart cried out, “Do I really surrender all? I want my son back. Is that surrender?”

Years later, here I am, struggling to walk by faith trusting God by grace even though we have had to endure incredible pain, not only from the death of our son but cancer and numerous other forms of brokenness common to mankind. So, I understand the struggle of living by faith every day - but listen. God is sovereign and you can trust Him. He has entrusted this suffering to you. There are many nonbelievers who also suffer from heart disease as you do. But God has filtered this trial into your life so that you might show the world the difference between how the Christian and the non-Christian responds to these trials.

A few years ago, a dear friend of mine in his 30's learned he had a Stage Four brain cancer. He had but a few months to live. One day he invited me to his house for lunch. He was nearly blind and growing more and more weary. As he sat across the table from me he said, "Chuck, I want to walk my girls (both preteens) down the aisle but I know I will not be able to do that. I need to ask you two questions." I assured him I would do my best to answer them. He looked me square in the eye through his sunglasses and with a sobering voice said, "Chuck, is God really Sovereign?" Not really stunned by this I responded, “Yes, you know He is.” Then he raised an even more critical question. He said, "If God is sovereign, can I trust Him?"

He nailed the essence of true faith. God is sovereign and you can trust Him. The real question is, “Will you?” Listen carefully to the words of a fellow struggler. You cannot outgive God. No matter what you have to bear in this life, as you do so to glorify God He will owe you nothing because He is debtor to no man. So when you grow weary and think of ending it all, beat on His chest. He can take it. He invites your questions. Tell Him you are claiming 1 Corinthians 10:13 and that He promised He will not give you more than you can bear. But keep in mind as you read that verse what God really promised was the grace to endure the trial. He never promised to take it away.

Your trial, though it is for a season, cannot outweigh what God has reserved for you in glory. Until that day you must remain faithful in your pain. In fact, it is in the middle of our weariness and broken dreams and our pain we learn to trust. That is why I often say, "Pain is actually your friend since it teaches how to love and trust your God."

So rather than end your life, surrender it to the Master Who will surround you with His love and grace to endure.