Help! Our only child was murdered...

In this episode Dr. Betters answers the question, "Our only child, our 18 year old son, was murdered last year. We're supposed to be Christians. My husband is even a pastor. But I have lost my faith in the goodness of God. I am in such complete and total despair. I've struggled with doubts (probably due to my OCD and scrupulosity) about my salvation for years. Now I'm more terrified than ever that I'll go to Hell because no matter how much I pray, listen to sermons, and read the Bible, my faith in the goodness of God is gone. He knows I desperately need my son, but He allowed him to be murdered. I can't see God's love or feel comfort from Him. I am just in complete despair. For 15 months I have spent hours on end most days watching TV. I have no joy in anything. I'm worried about my marriage. My husband is in such horrible grief too and he is murderously angry with the man that killed our son. I truly don't know where else to turn or how to cope. We have no other kids to love and be loved by nor do we have grand kids from our Robert. And, most of our family and friends are are tired of dealing with our grief. We are so alone!"